My 2014 In 3 Paragraph

I’ve been traveled accross continent, i've been to the North Sea, I broken heart to the deepest, I lost my favorite person, for the first time in my life I speak my heart and hurt someone’s, And lost again another favorite person, So i lost my appetite to finish my master thesis, I’ve been in the valley of shit.  I have a few trusted friends whom I know I can speak truth and they accept me for who I am. I learn how to play guitar and I mastered Joni Mitchell – a case of you; which I found helping me to relive my pain from losing someone -- a little bit. I learn a few phrases of Deutsch and willing to continue learning it even though I don’t know if I still have time. I’m worrying my future, I am afraid of getting old without doing something meaning full in my life. so I get my appetite back to finish my master thesis, made my supervisor yelled at me many times because I often bothering him with my crappy ppt slides. I cried in my motorbike. I promise I will beat him in my thesis defense. And I did it. And I thank him for he yelled at me because he made me learn.

2014 has been teaching me to do whatever I want to do. Because no matter how hard you try to do your life, there will always someone who’ll criticize you for anything that you do and don’t. It teaches me that, if someone is really care about you, if they get angry of you, they would explain what makes them angry, so you can apologize to them, and they’ll still around. Not just run. Be yourself no matter how shitty you are because the best thing you can do to yourself is only being you. Unless you can be batman, then be it. Be nice to people but never try to impress them because that is overrated and overrated is boring and exhausting. Your help will only useful if they really wanted to be help, else, your time is precious, respect yourself, skip the shit.

During the shitty yet beautiful year of 2014, I’ve been worrying my life like hell. I keep questioning all the uncertainty that will happen to my life after graduation. Will my skill would be useful? Will I get a job? Will I fall in love again? Will I still be in Bandung? Will I get a PhD sometimes? will I ever see him again? And other buzzy questions which most of it of was nonsense. It did makes me depressed and sad. And like other mainstream human being, I talk to God, i asked to Him for help and. he did. I finally graduate, working 3 months with my lecturer, and get a real job after that. I just realized that maybe… what God wants from me is he just wanting me to ask, for His help, and have faith that He’ll help me, so simple yet so hard to understand. I know  i'm indeed not easy. so welcome March 2015. better late than never.